i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
