I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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