I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Randomize