You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
