i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize