For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
