A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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