My friends, they love my intelligence
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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