i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I did not marry a roomba.
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