My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize
