My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
