loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
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