yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
