His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Did you pee in the oven last night??
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize