Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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