I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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