I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
that may or may not have been my penis.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
