Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
