My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
