I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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