So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
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i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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