THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize