Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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