He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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