ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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