I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
