You really coming over, don't trick.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
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And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
jump out the window naked night went bad
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