guys are not supposed to queef...right?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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