I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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