Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
