"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
