I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize