she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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