I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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