In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize
