You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize