btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Found your dick twin last night
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
