oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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