how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
