I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I want to fling myself into the sun
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize