OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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