Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
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I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
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it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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