He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
