I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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