used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Watching her eat just hurts me
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
