the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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