We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
