Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
