Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
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Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
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I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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