"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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