Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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