HIV tests are more positive than that guy
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
