Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
